Текст песни:

Story
We now return to "Celebrity Apprentehh"

Donald Trump Impression
Now Lil' Jon, why do you think your team lost?

Lil' Jon
WHO WHAT?

Donald Trump Impression
You're supposed to be this great rapper
How'd you lose a rap battle with the deaf bitch?

CBS News
We interrupt your program for a special word from the President of America

Obama Impression
My fellow Americans
I have, uh, some shit to tell you
I know one president getting some anal from Michelle
Bitch, I got him
Saw bin Laden out in Pakistan, and shot him in the dome
And told him, there you go
I got him, yo

We solved a fucking problem, Joe?
Let's break out the Hennessy
Everybody, smack a bitch around from here to Tennessee
Now let us see which Dirka Dirka wants another round with me
I thought I told you crackers, you don't wanna fuck around with me

Osama bin Laden
Ay, bro, recognize me?
I look like the Durrky selling you a Slurpee
So much noise about me
Everybody judge me
No one ever loves me
They say, that I'm dead
They don't even know I work at liquor store
They test my DNA

Science Man 1
This says, "Kareem Abdul Jabbar"

Science Man 2
Yeah, that's him

Osama Impression
I drive a cab in New York
I did Nine-Eleven
I fight for Jihad
al-Quaeda give me discount card

Obama Impression
Bitch please, b-b-bitch please
Get off your fuckin' camel
Get your fuckin' sandals
Taking, we're t-t-taking
All your fuckin' countries
From you fuckin' monkeys

Osama Impression
Bro, I'm from Africa,
I, come from Baghdad,
The, Jews took my cologne,
I, smell like a dog

News Man Impression
Mr. President, who should we blow up next?

Obama Impression
Well, I know Prince William,
He living like a king
He don't do shit,
He just sit, and get shit for free
How the hell are you gonna let him pay his wedding,
With the money he took from you
Motherfucker, let him pay for it

What a bunch of pale, cross-bred, yeah, they all FAIL
One of them is dead, and the others should be all in jail
Oh, Prince Charles, living large, but your mom in charge
Fuck you, William, and tell the Queen to slob all on my knob

Queen Impression
We're all living like kings
Raping all the peasants
Taking all their presents
So much nice things
We could have it all
We take it from the poor

Prince William
Hee-hee

Queen Impression
They say we're inbred
I gotta fuck me cousin, take a look at London
They mad, they want bread
But they can eat me ass poop

Prince William
AHAHAHAAHHAHAHAAAA

Obama Impression
Bitch please, b-b-bitch please
Take off the fuckin' crown and
Blow your fuckin' man, bitch
Hey Queen, H-H-Hey Queen
Get off the fuckin' horse and
Make me a fuckin' sandwich

Osama Impression
Bro, fuck you William,
And, fuck your fat whore
Bitch, you can suck my balls
I, fuck you by force

Donald Trump Impression
Hello my name is Donnie Trump
I make a billion every time I take a dump
I don't need to win the White House, I'll just buy it
I bought the Taliban and told Osama that he's fired

Now Imma smart guy, what the hell's this royal wedding?
I bought the palace and I'll move in when I'm fuckin' ready
So when you see the Prince of England stare and point and say
Ey, you got some free shit, bozo

All Lawyer
You got some free shit

Donald Trump Saying
Got some free shit,
Free shit,
IT'S FREE SHIT

Donald Trump Impression
Bitch please, b-b-bitch please
Get all your fuckin' boys and
Watch my fuckin' show, yeah
Taking, we're ta-a-aking
All your fuckin' oil
Yeah bitch, O'Doyle rules

Osama Impression
Bro, I'm from Africa,
Don't fuck with my bros
My crew's from Mexico,
I blow myself up

Obama Impression
My fellow Americans,
Today Osama bin Laden was found at a 7-Eleven in Pakistan, Ohio
I greeted him there myself, with a birthday card as I haven't seen him in over ten years
I asked him to come to my daughter's birthday party
He declined, so I shot him in the face....Myself
We can all rest assured that Michelle will be giving me a blow job tonight...with her mouth this time

Obama Impression
Am I really the first black man that has to convince people I killed somebody?
Michelle, what's that smell?